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感情を上手く表すには?
- #1
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- 悩める28歳
- 2008/03/04 18:54
20代後半です。私には1年位つきあっているアメリカ人の彼氏がいるのですが。。最近あまり上手くいってません。原因はいろいろあると思いますが、一番は私が上手く自分の感情を表せないことにあります。以前彼と付き合うまでは、自分が感情を表せないということに気づいてはいませんでした。前に付き合っていた彼氏は日本人の男性だったし、そんなに感情や思っていることを表現するようには要求されなかったように思います。今の彼がアメリカ人だからというわけではないのですが、例えば悲しい顔をして彼を見つめる。。私としては何を考えているのか察して欲しい。という思いが、彼にとっては無言の暴力でしかないようです。
自分でも彼がいうように何でも表現しようと思うんですけど思うようにはいきません。。特に辛い時悩んでいる時、悲しい気持ちや苦しい気持ちをうちあけたいのですが、なぜか思うように表現できず、彼を不快な気持ちにさせてしまいます。
長くリレーションシップを持続する為に、皆さんはどう自分の感情を表現していますか?何かアドバイスございましたら、ぜひよろしくお願い致します。
- #15
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- 青猫
- 2008/06/05 (Thu) 19:04
- Report
コミュニケーションで関係が成り立っているかいないかは、白人女性の友達の多さで分かるよ。アメリカ人の同性の友達を増やせばすぐに問題も解決できるよ。じゃなければ、マンネリした時に破局になる人が多い。
- #16
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- mopa
- 2008/06/05 (Thu) 22:15
- Report
>ネイティブじゃないことを分かってて付き合ってるくせに、常に自分の土俵に上がって勝負しろと言う態度は、ハッキリ言って好かん
そのとおりだね。無言は暴力だなんてジョークだろ?英語を言い訳にするな、と言われて感激するなよ。日本語ができない言い訳が必要なのは彼だもんなー。
- #18
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私の彼も白人。これでもかーっつと言うくらいよく喋るし、知らない人がいても、友達?って思うくらい誰とでも話す。勿論私が黙ってる、様子が変だとどうしたの?と聞いてくる。でもすぐに反応できない私はたまに黙りこんでしまいます。気づけ〜って思っても無理。やっぱり違うんですよね。だから話す、伝えるでないと通じません。相手に伝える事は、貴方にとっても彼にとっても大切なコミュ二ケーションです。黙ってれば分かるなんて日本人感覚は通じないと思います。つくづくそう思います・・・・。
- #19
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- 足の親指
- 2008/06/05 (Thu) 23:32
- Report
#17さん
いい歳したオッサンだけど。。。ありがとね
オレの書き込みはほとんど、ただのボヤキと屁理屈だから
あまり感心できんはずだよ
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