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Topic

Old age in Japan or the U.S. ?.

Free talk
#1
  • pooske
  • mail
  • 2022/09/22 23:14

End of life, but which is better ?

I've heard that in the U.S. it's hard to have that kind of money, that you need more than $1 million over 10 years to be miserable in a nursing home. So if you move in when you are in your 70s and live to be 90, you would need $2 million.
On the other hand, in Japan, if you have 50 million yen for 10 years, they will take care of you in a decent place. 100 million yen for 20 years.

The current view is to be based in the U.S. until you have some freedom to move around, and then sell to Japan.

The food would be better than the US facility, and since all the kids are back in Japan, they would come to see us once in a while.
What do you all think?

I retired at 55. I will receive a pension from Japan starting next month and from the U.S. next year I will receive a pension from the U.S. I am 61 years old.
90% of my assets are in the US. I have a residence in Japan and live in both.

What are your candid thoughts?

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#2
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/23 (Fri) 07:15
  • Report

I knew someone who came to the U.S. with his parents and lived there, but the children returned home first
and eventually the husband passed away and lived alone
but the children's permanent residency became invalid because they did not live there
and they decided it was better to return to Japan than to bury their bones in the U.S.
all I knew someone who decided to return to Japan.

The decision to bury one's bones or to return permanently to one's own country depends on one's own feelings.
It is tough to live with a half-hearted feeling.

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#3
  • 団塊
  • 2022/09/23 (Fri) 08:10
  • Report

> Please let me know your honest thoughts. In my case, I have a spouse, so I am thinking of returning to Japan after one of us takes care of the other here. I am thinking of returning to Japan when the remaining person also needs nursing care. I have heard that nursing care here is expensive and terrible, as you said.

> Then, if we move in when we are in our 70s and live until we are 90, we will need $2 million.

It depends on the individual and the nature of the nursing home, but generally speaking, the length of stay in a nursing home ( with a high level of care ) is about a year.

The family ( spouse or family ) will take care of the elderly when their level of care is low, and they will move into the home when they can no longer do so. In other words, everyone manages on their own until the very last minute. By the time they enter the home, they are getting very weak, so they don't have that long to live. At most, one year.

In Japan, there is a facility called "Sa-ko-jyu ( Serviced Senior Citizen's Housing ) ( It is like an apartment with a dining room and rent of 2,300,000 ) Recently my friend ( a single man in his early 70s ) entered such a place.
He is in his early 70s.
He seems to be the youngest. He was teased that it was a little early for him ? but he moved while he could.

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#3
  • は?
  • 2022/09/23 (Fri) 08:30
  • Report



It is up to you to decide whether you want to bury your bones or return to your country permanently. That's right ? LOL!

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#5
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/23 (Fri) 09:31
  • Report

I've heard that nursing care over here is expensive and terrible, as you say.
It seems that in Japan, it is not so expensive and terrible.

I often hear on the news that caregivers are rough with them and kill them, but
in the U.S. it seems to be an everyday occurrence and not newsworthy.

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#5
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/23 (Fri) 09:39
  • Report

3
Of course.
I don't want to talk to others about my life and have them tell me what I should do.
I don't want others to decide for me.

This kind of topic itself may be a way to say that you are different from others here.
I can see that you want to boast about it.

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#5
  • 倍金万
  • 2022/09/23 (Fri) 09:42
  • Report

In my case, both of my children were born here, and when they were in elementary school, I decided to move here permanently because I thought that returning to Japan would cause them a lot of pain.

At that point, I decided to bury my bones here, without thinking of returning to Japan to lead an elegant life in my old age.

Therefore, the thought of "Japan or the U.S. ? in my old age" has never occurred to me. I feel nostalgia for the time when I was born and raised in Japan, so I make a trip to Japan once a year to see old friends and to visit rural areas with unique Japanese nature to heal my mind. I am only doing this after I have made enough money in this area.

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#11
  • クロネコ
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 00:02
  • Report

I guess in life, those who have made a fortune are the ones who win.

I have about 10 more years to go, and if money is not a problem, I would like to return to Japan completely as I can stand the intense heat. Like #10, I no longer find American life attractive.
I am tired of trying to like a country I don't like.

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#12
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 01:42
  • Report

> I often hear in the news about caregivers roughing them up and killing them
but in the U.S. it seems to be a daily occurrence and not newsworthy.

No, I think it's the other way around
America is so strict that if there is any kind of abuse, the license is immediately revoked
You can immediately sue in court.

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#13
  • ピンキリ
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 04:59
  • Report

In the U.S., so-called "endowments" are all over the map, depending on the amount of money they cost. Of course, I think it is the same in Japan, but as a matter of fact, I think there is a problem with Kiri in the U.S.
My husband was seriously injured and had an operation at Kaiser, and for his rehabilitation, he was sent to a place that was also an endowment ?. The rehabilitation center and the endowment ward were separated, but when he went to the rehabilitation ward, he had to go through a passageway in front of the endowment. In that corridor, elderly people, probably with dementia, were lined up in the corridor, sitting in wheelchairs with belts preventing them from standing on their own. I think it is because they might be in danger of falling down if they stand up on their own, and also because they might not be able to go anywhere on their own. But there were 7 ~ 8 such elderly people in wheelchairs sitting with the backs of their wheelchairs against the wall in the hallway.

My husband was supposed to stay at that facility for two months. I walked past it every day on my way to my husband's hospital room. Old men would reach out to me and talk to me. In non-sentence English 。。。。 I didn't know them at first, but I couldn't help but look at them while my husband was doing his rehabilitation because the rehabilitation room was near there. I observed that the nurse would come to give them medicine when it was time to go. They all had to go to the bathroom at the same time. Those who could eat by themselves were taken to a place like a cafeteria for lunch. Those who could eat by themselves were taken to a place like a cafeteria, and those with limited mobility were fed by the nurses. There seemed to be a routine for the elderly in wheelchairs. The nurses seemed to be performing their tasks rather than taking care of them. I was very scared as we passed by these wheelchair-bound old men. The nurses would not even look at the old men when they reached out and complained about something. They just seemed to be doing their job, giving him his medicine when it was time to take it, and so on. I wonder if the family knows about this kind of thing.

I thought to myself, "If I am going to be in a nursing home, it should definitely be in Japan. At the very least, I felt that I would be taken care of in a more compassionate way. But it's in Japan.... ?
Of course, there are places in the U.S. where you can get better care if you pay a lot of money, but
I have seen such a chilling experience that it is still burned in my mind.
After 3 weeks I couldn't stand the situation and Kaiser switched me to another care facility that only does rehab...

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#14
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 07:19
  • Report

# If money is not a problem, we can withstand the extreme heat, so

that would be fine as long as you don't leave your air conditioned room.
But we also need to think about how we can live without stepping outside.

It is still better to meet your end in a familiar place, so you don't have to worry about unnecessary things.
We need to consider that preparing a place to live in Japan is not the same as going back to Japan
.

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#15
  • ひろ
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 08:33
  • Report

>>>> But we also need to think about how we can live without stepping outside.

In Tokyo, there are quite a few complexes of residences, offices, and commercial facilities. You can live a comfortable life
without stepping outside.

If you take the best of both Japan and the U.S. ? I think ・ ・ ・ ・
you can go back and forth twice a year or so.
I can think of a lot of things while I'm healthy, but when I'm not, I'll have to decide one way or the other.

But if it's a little longer term, I think you have to include political factors and earthquakes.

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#16
  • 倍金万
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 08:44
  • Report

#13 Mr. Pinkiri,

I guess it all depends on money. In Japan, it seems that some facilities are so bad that there was a news story about a nurse who got mad and killed a patient. The comparison of Japan vs. the U.S. is a very broad one, and if you don't get accurate information, you will end up making a wrong decision. I have already saved my fortune so that I can recuperate at home when my head becomes a blur and my body has to be in a wheelchair. But if I become completely demented, I have no idea where I will be or what kind of care I will receive, and I will be entirely dependent on my companion and my children. Worst case scenario, I might be poisoned and end up in Anoyo, but that would be a blessing in disguise.

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#17
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 09:48
  • Report

15
You will have to order home delivery and won't be able to shop.

If my body gets lame from lack of exercise, my life expectancy will be reduced.
If you live in an office, commercial building and have leisure facilities, Fitness, swimming pool, and even a spa, there is nothing to say.

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#18
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 10:59
  • Report

one can conquer evil with one's own hands

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#19
  • pooske
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 19:46
  • Report

It is a truly vexing question. If there is only one option, then it is decided, but there is also the problem of having a choice.
I do not want to inconvenience my spouse, children, and others. I have promised my spouse that we will not care for each other. We do not want to waste time with each other in our short remaining lives. We have already wasted more than two years with the corona disaster.
If we leave California and go to a different state, it will be less expensive, but it is also true that there is discrimination against yellow people. Your opinions are greatly appreciated. Please post more of your thoughts.

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#21
  • pooske
  • 2022/09/24 (Sat) 20:59
  • Report

Showa Ototto

The good thing about the U.S. is certainly the working environment and wages, but I think there is more to it than that.
I can only vaguely describe it as freedom, but I think the ability to spend time without worrying about what others around you think is a big part of it.
Also, what will happen to Japan depending on future moves by China ? The U.S. will respond with security to some extent, but in the end it will be abandoned.
At that time, it will become a U.S. state ? I think that will be the only way, but, or it will prepare its military now and become a force that can compete with China alone ?
In all likelihood, China and Japan cannot cross paths. If they stop the one-party politics of the Communist Party, we will know, but as long as that continues, it is impossible.
I hope that we will not reach that point, at least not in our lifetime. Beyond that, I think it is the efforts and will of the next generation. There is nothing we can leave to the next generation. I like both the US and Japan. There are points that the U.S. does not like about Japan. Conversely, there are things about Japan that I dislike about the US. It is a luxury.

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#22

We are a couple who worked in the US and returned to Japan after retiring early a few years ago, and have no regrets so far. I feel peace of mind in every respect. Of course, there are many good things about the U.S., but in Japan, food is good and cheap everywhere you go, service is good, and life is easy. Even though it is hot in the summer, it is not to the point of death.

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#23
  • 人それぞれだけど
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 04:47
  • Report

20

Single ?
I live in the US now just for work and money ?.

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#24
  • 団塊
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 06:46
  • Report

> #13Pinkiri-san

The reality of care is exactly like a modern day ubasan.
In my case, I am not as well funded as Mr. Doubukin, so I am afraid that I will end up in a facility with that kind of treatment. Well, when I need nursing care, I will choose Japan. Until then, I'll continue to live in the South Bay, where the climate is great. The climate here is worth it.
There are plenty of places with warm winters, but this is the only place with cool summers. If it rained even 1/100th of what it does in Japan, I'd be happy.

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#24
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 06:48
  • Report

20 You must be living in a low-income category. You must be in a similar position because you seem to write a lot of posts slandering only low income people.

The neighbor's garden must look beautiful.
Japanese who live in foreign countries look to Japan, but
Japanese who live in Japan look to foreign countries.

If you take 300,000 Japanese yen to a country in Southeast Asia where it costs about 1,000,000 yen,
you will find that you can live more prosperously.

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#26
  • ボランティア
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 08:20
  • Report

American nursing homes, really clerical and without warmth. It's all superficial. Especially these days, there are many H-types and they are talking from the top, which is scary. The reality is that the bedridden people only come to see them a few times a day if they don't have medicine. Volunteers come and talk to them.
I did it after they cut my ticket. It is a good social lesson. One locker all property, 6 people in a room, it's hard if you can't get along. I hope it's not cognitive, but if it is, it might be the way they treat things.

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#27
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 09:25
  • Report

#American nursing homes, real clerical, no warmth.
What do you expect?

Even if you expect heartfelt hospitality in a nursing home.

If you stay in a hotel or ryokan, you are a guest
and can expect heartfelt hospitality.

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#27
  • 倍金万
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 09:32
  • Report

> In my old age, I will spend my time in Japan, bathing in hot springs and eating delicious food


This is only until I am physically and mentally healthy.

Imagine the second half of your old age.

Well, by then you won't even know where you are or who is nearby and what they are talking about.

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#29
  • ボランティア
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 09:55
  • Report

Residents of nursing homes are customers too, in a sense.
Unless it's Medicare or some other insurance, then yes, but they should be treated equally. I don't expect anything. It means that when I volunteered, that was the reality. The nurses probably know best to ignore the elderly who reach out and complain every day because they want to be left alone for no reason. A family member or friend would have dealt with it. But it was family that put him there, too.
If they don't know why anymore, and if they get dementia, it's a profitable thing, and they don't even know, so they won't be bothered.
Showa Grandpa.

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#30
  • 万年貧乏底辺な昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 13:45
  • Report

I've been in the US for over 20 years, working with Americans at a major local company, and getting paid reasonably well.
After all, other than the working environment and wages, there are specific areas where the US is better than Japan, including medical insurance ?.

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#31
  • 身分がどうであれ革靴を履き同じ高さの椅子に座る
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 14:35
  • Report

> > There are places where America is better than Japan ?

I think it is where we can treat each other as equals as human beings, no matter what our status or income is.

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#32
  • 万年貧乏底辺な昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 16:11
  • Report

31
> Where people can be treated as equals as human beings, no matter what their status or income is.

The country with the widest gap between the rich and the poor and the most racist in the world
Without insurance, you can't even ride in an ambulance and doctors refuse to treat you, but you are talking about Japan ?.

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#33

About 8 years ago, upon my retirement at age 70, I was considering moving into a CCRC (Continued Care Retirement Community) in Silicon Valley and looked around at the candidates. I found that the good ones were expensive both ・ and monthly, with a one-time move-in fee of $ 200k- $ 1M, and food expenses $ 5k-7k/m for two people, and a several year waiting list was the norm.
So I checked similar CCRCs ( in Japan ) and found that the upfront fees are $ 0- $ 700k, expenses $ 2-4k, and there is no waiting period and the rooms are available immediately. In other words, there was a difference of about 2x ( ) between CA and Japan for the same class at that time. The current rate would be almost 3 times as much.
My wife and I went to Japan and toured the facility ・ and felt that the level of staff at the facility was superior to similar facilities in the US. Since we were both born in Japan and usually lived in Japanese, ate Japanese food, and watched only Japanese TV, we decided to move to Japan, believing that we would have no problems living in Japan. In fact, after moving to Japan, the facility met my expectations, the staff were all friendly, and I had no problems. However, I gradually began to feel uncomfortable with the way I interacted with the other residents living in the facility, and my wife became almost depressed after the move. My wife, who was used to the American way of frank socializing, could not seem to get used to the Japanese ( way of socializing, especially with the elderly ). Also, she had never lived in a so-called "apartment complex" before, so that may have had an effect on her. After two years, they decided to move back to the U.S. and are now living in a house in Hawaii. We decided not to consider moving to a facility as long as she was physically able to do so.

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#34
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 17:02
  • Report

The son of a Mexican man I knew
had a serious car accident and was in a life and death situation.
Without insurance, he couldn't ride in an ambulance, and doctors and hospitals wouldn't deny him treatment.
His son said he had a claim for about a million dollars, but he could not pay it
because he had no income, so he was let go.

In his late teens, he was sitting on the street talking to a friend when he got hit by a stray bullet in a gang shootout
and was taken to the hospital but did not have to pay for treatment.

In America, if you don't have money, you can live without it.

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#36
  • 仕事だけの引きこもり?
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 17:02
  • Report

30

There are many good things about the country: family, friends, vast nature such as beaches and mountains, climate, good working environment but you can earn a lot of money and have time for hobbies.

It's kind of a waste of life to live in a country you don't like until you retire.

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#39
  • 仕事だけの引きこもり?
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 19:03
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And I have a good job, which is why I have a good personal life. LOL

I guess I came all the way to America to work in the black ?.

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#41
  • pooske
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 19:53
  • Report

SJDummy

Thank you for your valuable experience. It is true that Japan is a unique country in terms of human relations. Also, people are quick to compare. I think there is also a disposition to not easily accept strangers.

Hawaii is an option, but as long as we can both stay out of trouble with our spouses, it is fine, but eventually we will have to go into an institution.

Our father had my mother take care of him downstairs until he died last month, which we can't do. We have asked my mother to go into an institution if it becomes too hard for her.

We have heard that if she becomes immobile, the level of care she needs will be higher and not only more expensive, but the number of facilities that will accept her will be greatly reduced.

No, I am just worried.

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#44
  • ハワイ元在住者
  • 2022/09/25 (Sun) 23:04
  • Report

Everything is expensive in Hawaii.
You should expect to pay 1, 5 to 2 times as much.
The islands are far from the continent and vulnerable to natural disasters.

If I could make enough money to hire a care giver 24 hours a day, I would like to stay in the US, but I don't have kids, so maybe Japan.

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#45
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/26 (Mon) 06:49
  • Report

# And I have a good job, which is why I have a good personal life.

Is there a stipulation as to what kind of work constitutes a good job?

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#48
  • 仕事だけの引きこもり?
  • 2022/09/26 (Mon) 13:59
  • Report

45

Regulations or nothing, don't you usually figure it out for yourself ?
It's not a good job unless you think it's good, no matter what others say.

I wrote that it is a good job because it is a job I like and it pays well and treats me well. 45 what is your idea of a good job?

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#51
  • Zappo
  • 2022/09/26 (Mon) 15:16
  • Report

I wouldn't give up the beach, climate, and a house with a pool.

Hawaii would be nice, but I think I'll just do vacations. I hear it's a pretty small society.

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#53
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/26 (Mon) 15:53
  • Report

48

I'm asking because I don't know.

I make a living collecting empty cans and bottles on garbage collection day.
I'm relieved to have a good job.

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#56
  • トホホ
  • 2022/09/26 (Mon) 18:32
  • Report

53

If you're happy, that's fine.
You are a healthy person who lives in a shared apartment for the rest of your life, and you are doing your best to live in poverty and without time to spare.
If no one loves you and you don't love them, that's fine, as long as you're happy.
You enjoy sushi without paying a tip.
That was so good!

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#57
  • pooske
  • 2022/09/26 (Mon) 21:16
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I watched "Morning Glory 2022 Special" on an illegal site. At what point I may enter a nursing home, but I keenly felt that I would like to send a message to my family and decide where to go, like Saburo Tokito did. I will return to Japan temporarily next month and would like to look around. I assume it will still be more than 10 years away, but I thought I gave my children some idea of what to expect. Even if I rarely come to see them, I would like to finish my last days in Japan with my two children. My wife and I do not need to be in the same facility. I am sure we would both be concerned if we were in the same facility. If they were in the U.S., they would have a hard time. I would like to end my life with as little inconvenience to my children as possible.

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#58
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/09/27 (Tue) 06:32
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56
Autumn is coming and I wonder what others are doing

Living in a small Japanese society, I wonder about others

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#60

Other states are ?.

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#61
  • あのね
  • 2022/10/03 (Mon) 10:32
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Japan

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#62
  • おっさん
  • 2022/10/03 (Mon) 15:40
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Vietnam, Thailand

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#63
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/10/04 (Tue) 10:44
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Japanese who live in the U.S. seem to aim for Japan in their old age

Japanese who live in Japan Japanese who live in Japan aim for a foreign country in their old age.

Either way, it is better to aim for a place where it is easy to live.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sl2mZbnr3EU&t=5s

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#65
  • 隣の芝は
  • 2022/10/04 (Tue) 13:12
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The grass looks greener on the neighbor's lawn.
From Japan, foreign countries look good.
Japanese who live in California have seen many bad things about the U.S.,
so they look at it with a kind of cold eye. They tend to think that Japan is better and they want to live there.
Either way, if you choose one, the other one looks better, so I think it's best to have both.

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#66
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/10/04 (Tue) 15:54
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# You don't know if it's livable or not until you live there
If you don't know if it's livable, then you can live there for 3 months on a tourist visa, which is valid for 3 months
and draw your conclusions.
You will fail in the Butzke production.

# It is easy to think that Japan is better and you want to live there.
What is better about Japan?

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#67
  • Q
  • 2022/10/04 (Tue) 21:55
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>>Either way, if you decide on one, the other one looks better, so I think both are best

You may think so when you are young, but
you may not think so when your body can no longer do what you want and your strength is declining.

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#70
  • 昭和のおとっつぁん
  • 2022/10/05 (Wed) 08:20
  • Report

68

It's normal for elderly people to look for other places to live if they can't survive in Japan.
It seems they don't know any other country besides Japan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nuQ6WRn_qaw

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#71
  • 倍金万
  • 2022/10/05 (Wed) 08:49
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#65 Neighbor's Lawn,

You are absolutely right. In the past, I came here because I thought the US would be a good place to live, but I could not get a great job because I was not on a proper visa. He came to the U.S. in the past because he thought it would be easier to live here, but he couldn't get a good job because he didn't have the proper visa.

However, he came back to Japan and started working again, saying that he liked the American life better. But he came back to Japan and started to work again. After repeating this, he disappeared. He was a poor man.

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